Friday 16th August is Bad Poetry Day!


Our team gave it their best shot, and penned some verses on their special subject: pensions and savings! Are the rhymes truly terrible? You be the judge! 

Help! (Alan Morahan)

Boris is PM
What hope have we got?
Get a pension.

Pensions haiku (Gavin Zaprzala-Banks)

Glorious autumn
Acorns hidden in the earth
Relax and enjoy

The romance of pensions? (Steve Scott)

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I’ve got a pension
You need one too!

A dirty word (Gavin Zaprzala-Banks)

Save in a pension? Nah, I’ve got property.
Save in a pension? No, thanks. I’ll keep on working.
Save in a pension? No need, the State will provide.
Save in a pension? If only, I can’t afford it.
Save in a pension? Not me, I’m holding out for inheritance.
Save in a pension? Not yet, you’re only young once.
Save in a pension? Not likely, they’re a con.
Save for your future? Where do I sign?

Oh I wish I’d looked after me saving… (Chris Eyre - with thanks to Pam Ayres – no relation)

Oh I wish I’d looked after me saving
Instead of going out raving
All the booze I consumed
As my confidence boomed
Oh I wish I’d looked after me saving

I wish I’d been that much more astute
And solved the problem right at the root
To pass up the invites
Of long sessions and big nights
I wish I’d not had such a hoot

As I enter into my middle ages
I wish I’d listened to the Sages
Who encouraged me to invest
Because they knew best
My work would now be in its final stages

Ensure sure you don’t make the same mistakes
Be more sensible for God’s sake!
Please don’t be too dense
You know a pension makes sense
‘Cos a happy retirement it doth make

The Pensioner (Harri Mead - with thanks to Walter de la Mare)

‘Is anybody there?’ said the pensioner,
Knocking at the provider’s door.
And they answered that they had looked at his pot,
But his investments had gone through the floor.

A writer’s lament (Patrick Horwood)

Writing about pensions should give me a clue
That saving more is the right thing to do
But my money still says goodbye
And the cost of retiring is too high
So I'll carry on commuting to Waterloo

Saving v Raving (Darren Hedgley)

It’s Friday and off to the pub we went
On pints and cocktails our money was spent
It was only next day
that we saw the error of our way
No money left in our banks
And just a large hangover of thanks

They said “save in to your pension”
I said a word I cannot mention!
Save for tomorrow and try not to borrow
You know it makes sense
Go on, Save those pounds, shillings and pence
Into your pension

Pensions limerick (Richard Booth - with thanks to Edward Lear)

There once was a young man from Stockwell
With so much cash that his pockets would swell
To relieve all his tension
He put it all in a pension
But got hit with the tax bill from hell

Posted by Sarah Tolson

Topics: Next Generation Savings, Friday Fun


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